i sat down this morning and planned out my hole day:
- nap for an hour
- do quiet time
- write rough draft for paper
- read for english
- read for history
pretty good plan i thought. well, i guess its the thought that counts.... i napped for about 4 hours and didnt get anything else done.
this weekend was the best weekend i have had in a long time. i got to go up and visit all my friends at Wofford. it was the first time i had stayed up there for a period of time since i transferred and it was so good!
I did alot of dancing....
alot of dancing.... and yes, im upside-down.
alot of catching up....
alot more dancing...
and just alot of fun!
when i first decided to leave Wofford, it was probably the hardest thing i have ever had to do. one thing about me is that i take my friendships very seriously. i pour everything i am into them. sometimes too much. so when i knew i had to leave, the hardest part was having to leave my friends and the relationships that i hold so close to my heart. i was so scared that when i left they were all going to just move on with life and forget about me and the friendship i had built with them. and when i had a hard time adjusting to auburn, i blamed it on the idea i had in my head that i would never find friends here like i had there.
dont get me wrong, there are a few friendships that i have with certain people at Wofford that i know will never be able to be matched in any way. ever. but i was clinging so tightly to those friendships that i wasnt allowing my self to make knew ones because i thought if i made new ones that would be like me forgetting my "old" ones or lessening the impact that they have had on me.
and i think that is why this weekend was so amazing for me. so much has changed in my life and in the lives of my friends at Wofford, but at the end of the day my friendships there have not changed at all. with each friend i talked to i was either laughing hysterically at all we had missed out on in each others lives, giving and getting advise on how to handle certain situations, being greatly encouraged spiritually, and so much more. even though so much had changed, alot had also stayed the same. and i needed to see that.
i told one of my friends that, in a way, this weekend made me feel even more free to really dive into my relationships here at auburn. and i am so happy to back. i really am so blessed with the friends that i have here. i see now that its not that i have moved on and forgotten in anyway. its that, like Psalm 37 says, i am making myself "dwell in the land" that the Lord has me at. and He really has blessed me with incredible friends here that laugh with (and at) me, encourage me, and really push me to be who God created me to be.
i really am so blessed and so thankful. i feel like the Lord continues to amaze me at how intricately He has planned my life. things keep coming up in my life where i see that if i had not transferred, or gone to project, or gone to southern union, and more, that i would never be able to know the Lord in the way that i do now.
tonight at ruf Richard laid the heat. it was SO good. he spoke on contentment and one of the things he said was,
"Jesus was not content to live without you. St. Augustine said it well when he said, 'God has made us for Him and our hearts are restless until they learn to find rest in Him'. You were made to rest on Christ. He is your life. Without Him you will always be searching."
it was so comforting to be reminded that God desires me. He really does pursue me. and in all his detailing of my life, he planned it that i would gradually come to know more and more of him. this weekend i got to experience a side of God that i love. joy. the joy of being in Christ will. with all the issues i had to deal with personally, i am finally to the point where i am so happy to be where i am at. i am so excited to see what God has for me next. and i am so thankful for the way the Lord got me here.